Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Milestones

27w2d......third tri......yeah, that's crazy. I can't even imagine being there right now. Although it is odd because there are times I find myself looking in the mirror, and in my head I am imagining my supposed to be belly.....wow, I am talking a lot about my m/c lately, huh?

Speaking of milestones....my EDD for this IUI would be Nov. 28th. If my baby is born between 37 and 38 weeks it will arrive the week of my loss. How is that for timing?

Oh and Jen....to answer your question about whether you think you will be jealous (envious and upset maybe?) of people with babies around the same age yours should have been.....I can say I already do that. For example, a few weeks after my m/c I went to the salon to get a pedicure and while I was there a woman brought in a baby around 6 months old. Now, this baby was her granddaughter and in all honesty I pictured some unwed, teenage child as her mother because the comment was made that they all live together......but anyways I digress. So after a few minutes it hits me....my babies would be right around that age this time next year (next year being 2008, as this happened in 2007). I couldn't even stand to look at that baby anymore (and she was super cute!)....I started to get teary eyed so it was a good thing I was just finishing up and didn't have sit there any longer. I think there will always be that part of your heart that imagines what life would have been even when life is great. Even when another baby comes around, there is always that thought of "this should be my second". I can't stand the fact I am no longer "prima gravida" and no baby to show for it. Of course you will love the new baby with that same fierceness....similarly like I am hoping and praying for a second chance just as hard as I wished for the first....but it is always there. At least I think it is....maybe others would disagree.

1 comment:

Jen said...

I've been giving some accidental mean looks recently to people with giant bellies. I have a feeling I am not even going to be able to look at newborns pretty soon.