It's hot....

But see, I don't mind hot really...it's only about 86 today, but it's HUMID. It's always humid from June to August (sometimes Sept. too) here, and it's the one thing I truly dislike about summer. Plus, it makes it so much harder to breath, especially for someone like myself. More power to those who live even further south than me! Ugh.....

Ha! Fooled ya!!!

Actually, I just made a mistake, lol. For those who are confused and got an invite for THIS blog...ignore it. THIS blog is open to all readers. I was a dodo and typed my invite list to the wrong blog. I resent the invites for the preggo blog.....hope you got it! =)

Random Thursday Things

Have I ever told you how much I love to cook? I love all of it (well, except the cleaning). I love finding a new recipe, going to the store to buy the perfect ingredients for it, chopping any needed veggies or making any type of base (broth, rue, trinity, etc), putting it all together, and then of course eating it! Lately, I have become obsessed with cooking new things, and spend my lunch hour parading the internet for food blogs. Here are my favorite three (so far):

1.) The Pioneer Woman: I love her blog all around, and her food section is amazing!

2.) Smitten Kitchen: I admire this woman for making delicious food in a kitchen smaller than my own. Plus A LOT of her recipes are vegetarian so I love that...I can't wait to try more of her stuff!

3.) The Skinny Gourmet: I made her lemon tart one time and it was super yummy. Overall, fun, informative and good eats too!

Second fact for the day: I eat pudding, yogurt, and ice cream/sherbet super slow. It drives my husband crazy, and I've been known to milk a pudding cup for a good 1o minutes.

Yay it worked!!!

I finally got my new template. It has tulips on it, and it makes me happy =)

Yeah, this is my 3rd post today BUT

this is a really important one!!! Head on over to Nancy's blog and give her a huge hip hip hooray!!! After a rocky start to this pregnancy, things seem to be looking up =D

Grrr on you blogger!!!

I have been trying to change my template all day! I found four I really liked so I copied and pasted each code into the edit HTML box so I could preview them. They all worked great....so I finally decided on one, put the same code into the box, hit "save template", it asked if I definitely wanted to delete all widgets and things that were on my previous layout, I hit "confirm and save". However, NOW blogger won't let this layout post, and I keep getting an error message. So I tried different template from several different sites....same deal, except now it won't even let me preview the damn things. WTH is going on?!?!

Calcium Overload

Do you know what happens when you drink 1/2 a gallon of OJ with Calcium in it in one evening? Yup, you guessed it....nauseous calcium overload......blah......

Oh how sad.....

I just heard that Ste.ven Cur.tis Chap.man's (famous Christian singer) five year old daughter died at the hospital after his teenage son accidentally backed over her with the car =( I can't even imagine.....such pain, such hurt, such guilt.....

I actually had a friend who was backed over by her Dad like that once. They lived on a huge hill and he forgot the parking break on the truck and when she went around to get the groceries out of the back, it started to roll and rolled over her. She was about 20 at the time, and was severely injured...I can't even imagine that impact on a child.

I've been tagged

I was tagged a few weeks back by several people so I figure I will fulfill my duty now =)

4 things I did ten years ago (1998)...

~Believe it or not I was an 8th grade cheerleader getting ready for HS
~I got my first real kiss
~My family moved into the house my parents still live in now
~I got my toy poodle, Stacie (who is just as spunky as ever)

4 things I did five years ago (2003)...

~I graduated HS
~I moved to Greensboro with my boyfriend of 2 years
~I broke up with boyfriend of 2 years
~I worked in a Vet's Office

4 things I did yesterday...

~I went to my doctors appt.
~I talked to my Mom
~I played outside with my dogs
~I watched NCIS with DH

4 shows I love to watch (seriously, just 4? I will admit I like TV at night, although I regularly complain there is nothing on)...

~Big Bang Theory
~How I met your Mother
~Top Chef
~NCIS

Oh, and Numbers and Ghost Whisperer (yeah, I cheated, lol)

4 things that really make me happy

~the thought of becoming a Mom and seeing DH as a Daddy
~warm (but not too hot or humid) spring/summer days
~spending time with my family
~a really good book

Oh, and massages, classical music, tulips, fresh garden fruits/vegetables, and first snowfalls =P

Because it was a pretty day

Several weeks ago I took pictures of my babies because it was so beautiful outside and we were all just enjoying the day....Now you get to enjoy the fruits of my labor ;-)

On a happier note....

Actually, this is the best thing I've heard all week. Hop on over to Nancy's blog and check out her great news!!! All positive, sticky bean thoughts headed her way would be great ;-)

It makes me physically ill (TRIGS!!!!!!)

I have talked about this triggery issue with several bloggers including my friend Nancy, who had a post a few weeks ago about someone we both knew of who is undergoing selective reduction. Long story short.....she triggered with WAY too many eggs (8+) against her RE's wishes, BD'd instead of doing the IUI (like that really makes a difference in this case), ended up with severe OHSS, got pregnant, and later told everyone she was pregnant with twins. Fine, right? She took a HUGE risk, and only ended up with twins so she was lucky. Well, later she revealed that she actually had 8 babies and the only reason she said she was having twins is because that is what she was reducing to. Then she goes in for her next ultrasound and the doc discovers another one.....so now she has 9 and is preparing to still reduce to 2. My initial response to this situation was met with mixed emotions.....one I was shocked she had so many (and obviously for physical reasons would need to reduce.....the scientist in me knows this), angry she put herself in this position by going against all doctor's wishes, sad because she IS in this position knowing the problems she must face, but understanding the desire she had that drove her to try and conceive after many years of failed attempts. In fact, my exact response to this discussion was as follows:

"Although I 120% believe she shouldn't have done what she did against doctor's wishes....we talked about that right when she did it AND it was a huge DUH when she got OHSS. I can't even imagine being faced with that decision...or hearing that news in the first place. No one expects to have 5 eggs and end up with 8 babies, especially someone who has tried for 2.5 years and nothing has worked in the past. I mean the statistics of that are just unreal. If this situation was different and she had triplets and just didn't want three so decided to go to twins I would be completely and utterly outraged if there was no medical reason she HAD to reduce.

No, I wouldn't have chosen to do what she did, but I *can* understand the desperate desire and mentality behind why this ultimately terrible decision was made. Trust me, my jaw hit the floor when I read that....so I'm not disagreeing that she was in the wrong to begin with (which at least she does acknowledge) or that the whole situation is f'ed up, but part of me does feel sorry for the position she put herself in, and the thought of actually going through THAT process is just too much to even think about."

Now, up until today I haven't really said anything about this situation, and I certainly haven't supported her, but reading her story today about the actual reduction makes me angry and physically sick....I had to talk about it here or I was going to go off. She had her reduction (for those who don't know how this is done, Potassium is injected into the fetus' heart to have it stop beating). An attempt on all 7 unwanted babies were made....only 5 took successfully. With the other two it made their heart slow down, but it picked right back up to normal.....these babies (on top of the twins she was already keeping)are still completely normal. So right now her total of living, healthy babies is 4. Yes quads is a HUGE deal, but it can be done and it has been done before! However, this is not what she wants....she wants twins.....so she goes back next week to try and kill the two that survived what I imagine to be a painful procedure. WTF!!!!! Like I said, I know that quads is a BIG deal....medically, emotionally and financially....but it is obvious these children didn't want to die. They lived for a reason, and unless carrying 4 would be lethal for the mother, to me it does not justify trying to kill these babies again!!!!! I'm afraid I can't even be around this situation anymore, which is sad because I do like talking to the other women included in this "group".

OMG, I'm LIVID!!!

Seriously...this IRS stimulus check stuff is bullshit. DH and I did our taxes this year via TurboTax, submitted them as an e-file (like we have always done) and got our refund check directly deposited into our account. Yipee, and the process took about 2 weeks total before everything was said and done and money was in hand. Now, we did this back in the beginning to middle of February when the talks of the stimulus check were just being started and released. So, the stimulus rebate first stated that "you will receive your stimulus in the exact same way as you received your refund". Awesome! DH and I did direct deposit, and based on the schedule that was published by the IRS we should of had our check by this Friday (based off the last two digits of DH's social). So, I'm hunting around the internet today and see an article about the stimulus check, etc, etc and then go to the IRS website to see the status of my stimulus check. Well, the website says it hasn't been sent out yet and there is no record of it within the past week. Interesting....I know we are getting one (I've already done THAT worksheet via the IRS). Then it goes to list reasons why you may not have received it and one of the reasons is because processing/filing fees were deducted from your refund from a tax preparer and/or you did a rapid refund (btw, this was NOT part of the original stimulus stipulations and it was added on as time got closer to giving them out).

Well, for those who have ever done TurboTax you of course have to pay for the little box you buy, and to e-file your taxes there is a 15.00 fee. So this got me thinking....we didn't actually go to a tax preparer who deducted their fees etc, and we didn't get a rapid refund, but would THIS affect my stimulus check even though I did do DD and SHOULD be under the DD schedule. So, I go to TurboTax and sure enough I find out that my check will be paper and NOT DD. I am LIVID and must find out why because this is not what was originally told to me when I filed back in the beginning of 2008, so I do a little more searching. As it turns out....it isn't the TurboTax fee that is preventing my check from being here this week, it is the fact I opted to do DD through TT who uses a bank, SBB&T, as a third party to get your refund deposited directly. SBB&T charges a 30.00 fee for this process which you can opt to have deducted from your refund (which is what TT recommends you do) or you can pay the fee via your credit card/debit/check card, but either way you get direct deposit. HOWEVER, if you opt to have the 30.00 fee deducted from your refund this is considered a "preparer" fee, and you will receive a paper check. This was NOT told to any of the TT users who filed before March 20th, and everyone who just found out about it is LIVID like myself. Number one, this was an additional stipulation after I had already filed, when I agreed to use SBB&T as a third party to get my DD it did NOT say it would delay my stimulus check, number 3 this method was what TT recommended for DD, and number 4 even though I had to give all of MY banking information to SBB&T to send my direct deposit too the government is NOT acknowledging this as a direct deposit (even though it was originally stated that you would get your stimulus in the exact same way you received your refund). Needless to say I am pissed because I just found this out today and was expecting my check by the end of this week....now (because of DH's ss) it won't be here until July 4th at the earliest.

Seriously, how is it fair that the government is making everyone think this stimulus check is so great when in essence they are just giving us back our own money we deserve in the first place and THEN find ways to screw over the people who actually file early by doing all of these "add-ons". Of course had I known this was going to happen I would have printed out my worksheets and mailed them in with my banking information on them for DD like I had done in the past, but no because I used TT, they said this method was the preferred way to go and would still be considered normal DD.

I sure hope I made sense the first time around because I'm not going back and reading this again right now =/

I'm terrible.

I've been a horrible blogger/online friend this past week. I have been lurking and keeping up with everyone, I just haven't been posting or commenting regardless of the situation....good or bad, and for that I'm sorry. I am still here though, and I have my reasons (which I may go into later this week), but for now I just wanted everyone to know I hadn't disappeared ;-)

Happy Anniversary to Me! (warning: trigs ahead)

Today...May 7th, is my 3rd wedding anniversary. Gosh, so much has happened in 3 years....in three years, DH and I have moved three times, he helped me through the stroke and death of my grandmother, both changed jobs, purchased our first home, bought 2 dogs, TTC'd for 32 months (29 cycles plus a 3 month mandatory break) including IF treatments, got through a miscarriage (hence the "mandatory break") and are now navigating pregnancy. Whew, haha! So, before I get into the heavy part of this post, I want to share some pictures of that wonderful day that started it all (btw, there is quite a few. My photographer took almost 800 pictures so you are lucky I narrowed it down this far, haha)....

Our Cake (vineyard was the theme)

DH before the wedding

Moi!

DH's look when he first saw me coming down the aisle. I LOVE the fact our photographer caught this because it is something I would have never seen otherwise.

Standing at the alter. I wanted to add this picture in so you could see how our wedding was set up outside.


The flower girls (i.e-My nieces)

My parents and I.

Our wedding party.

The next three pictures are of Thomas and I, and the photographer used several special effects for the final result. The "Sepia Kiss" actually won an East Coast photography contest!


First Dance.

Dance with Dad. I love my expression in this picture.

The car....Get R Done was compliments of my brother and a bottle of cheez whiz, lol.

Walking out to leave and seeing the car for the first time.

Off we go!!!!

Lastly (although this picture-on our honeymoon- is a bit blurry) I put it in so you could see how long my hair had to be for the style I wore in my wedding. For the record, it took almost 3 hours to pin-up!

Now, other than the fact I'm excited about today, there is also this weird, surreal feeling because as a lot of IFers can attest too things like holidays, birthdays and anniversaries always remind you of "what if's" or "what should have beens". It also has you thinking if "next year at this time, will I have a baby?", and each year that goes by when that doesn't happen is utterly heartbreaking. It actually gets to the point where you expect the next year to be exactly like the one now....childless, because a lot of the hope is gone. When DH and I got pregnant with the twins that was the first thing that crossed our mind....NEXT Thanksgiving will be different, NEXT Christmas will be spent with a baby....but when we m/c'd all of those dreams were taken away. So when the holidays rolled around after our m/c, we mourned the should have beens. Little did we know that we would become pregnant again just in time to still have those same changed holidays, anniversaries and birthdays. I'm a bit overwhelmed by this thought actually. I'm elated it's actually happening and I'm sad (and feeling a bit guilty) for those it won't happen too. If all goes as planned....this is the last anniversary DH will be just a family of two, this is the last Mother's day I won't have a child in the room as well, the last Father's Day for DH (and although yes, we are parents to be, you know what I mean here....the physical presence of a baby). It's amazing....it's humbling, and quite frankly, and as I said a bit emotionally overwhelming and surreal as well.

Meatballs and Buster

So after reading this post yesterday by Jen, I was inspired to make meatballs with my spaghetti last night. I made homemade crackers with sliced roasted garlic bread then crushed them, mixed it with ground turkey, egg, and terriyaki sauce....Voila! It was really yummy, and I even have some left over for lunch today.

Next, Buster is doing OK. The doc told us to leave the bandage on for 24 hours so it didn't bleed, however Buster had the thing off in 12. No, he didn't chew it off (good boy!) but he did shake it off (hmm, maybe it wasn't taped well to begin with). So last night of course the thing was still bleeding and I had to make a homemade bootie with socks. It actually worked quite well and he didn't seem to mind the sock as much as the actual bandage. First we took one of my socks and wrapped it around his foot to create pressure on his toe and taped it down. Then we put one of Thomas's socks over top of it like an actually sock and taped it down for extra protection and padding. We had to do the same thing this morning as well. We probably could have left the old (homemade) one on, but it had gotten all bloody and such so I wanted him to have a fresh one. I am going to re-dress it one more time this evening and if it still bleeding by tomorrow I will probably call the vet back. Have you ever had a dog with his toenail cut off before? They bleed like no other don't they?

Hello Monday....

Today started out like any other Monday....got up, ate breakfast, let the dogs out, proceed to getting ready. However, when I let the dogs back in DH noticed Buster's foot was all bloody. Turns out he ripped his toenail practically out of the bed (ouch!). So, that led to an unexpected trip to the vet at 8am to cut off the remaining nail, wrap it up, and have him sport a lovely e-collar for the next 24 hours (which of course he hates,haha) while the bandage is on. All is well and he is fine, but what a way to start out the week huh?

Oh, but I must say I am super impressed with the vet this morning because she wasn't supposed to come in until 9 (as in the assist. called her and she was still in her p.j's), but she said she needed to run a permission slip to her daughter at school so she would come by the office and do Buster's nail before going home and getting ready to actually come to work instead of making us wait an hour. It was super sweet.