It makes me physically ill (TRIGS!!!!!!)

I have talked about this triggery issue with several bloggers including my friend Nancy, who had a post a few weeks ago about someone we both knew of who is undergoing selective reduction. Long story short.....she triggered with WAY too many eggs (8+) against her RE's wishes, BD'd instead of doing the IUI (like that really makes a difference in this case), ended up with severe OHSS, got pregnant, and later told everyone she was pregnant with twins. Fine, right? She took a HUGE risk, and only ended up with twins so she was lucky. Well, later she revealed that she actually had 8 babies and the only reason she said she was having twins is because that is what she was reducing to. Then she goes in for her next ultrasound and the doc discovers another one.....so now she has 9 and is preparing to still reduce to 2. My initial response to this situation was met with mixed emotions.....one I was shocked she had so many (and obviously for physical reasons would need to reduce.....the scientist in me knows this), angry she put herself in this position by going against all doctor's wishes, sad because she IS in this position knowing the problems she must face, but understanding the desire she had that drove her to try and conceive after many years of failed attempts. In fact, my exact response to this discussion was as follows:

"Although I 120% believe she shouldn't have done what she did against doctor's wishes....we talked about that right when she did it AND it was a huge DUH when she got OHSS. I can't even imagine being faced with that decision...or hearing that news in the first place. No one expects to have 5 eggs and end up with 8 babies, especially someone who has tried for 2.5 years and nothing has worked in the past. I mean the statistics of that are just unreal. If this situation was different and she had triplets and just didn't want three so decided to go to twins I would be completely and utterly outraged if there was no medical reason she HAD to reduce.

No, I wouldn't have chosen to do what she did, but I *can* understand the desperate desire and mentality behind why this ultimately terrible decision was made. Trust me, my jaw hit the floor when I read that....so I'm not disagreeing that she was in the wrong to begin with (which at least she does acknowledge) or that the whole situation is f'ed up, but part of me does feel sorry for the position she put herself in, and the thought of actually going through THAT process is just too much to even think about."

Now, up until today I haven't really said anything about this situation, and I certainly haven't supported her, but reading her story today about the actual reduction makes me angry and physically sick....I had to talk about it here or I was going to go off. She had her reduction (for those who don't know how this is done, Potassium is injected into the fetus' heart to have it stop beating). An attempt on all 7 unwanted babies were made....only 5 took successfully. With the other two it made their heart slow down, but it picked right back up to normal.....these babies (on top of the twins she was already keeping)are still completely normal. So right now her total of living, healthy babies is 4. Yes quads is a HUGE deal, but it can be done and it has been done before! However, this is not what she wants....she wants twins.....so she goes back next week to try and kill the two that survived what I imagine to be a painful procedure. WTF!!!!! Like I said, I know that quads is a BIG deal....medically, emotionally and financially....but it is obvious these children didn't want to die. They lived for a reason, and unless carrying 4 would be lethal for the mother, to me it does not justify trying to kill these babies again!!!!! I'm afraid I can't even be around this situation anymore, which is sad because I do like talking to the other women included in this "group".