Since I'm leaving (well, more like being squeezed out, but leaving sounds so much better doesn't it?) my job I've interviewed with my old employment, Applebees, and I have another interview as a CNA this Wednesday. Well, today the manager from Applebees called back to make sure I still wanted to work there (actually I want the other job, but I wasn't going to turn down a sure thing until I found out about this new position) so I said yes. She said to call her back closer to my start date (May 18th) and we will get everything set up. Then she told me to have a happy Mothers Day (because we talked about my son during the first meeting) and I told her "Thank you, you too".
As soon as I said it my brain went "oh no!". What if she wasn't a mother? I know she was married, but what if she was infertile, come to think of it she never mentioned children....what if she was forced to make the decision to live child-free? What if she was in the 2WW? I immediately felt bad for reciprocating the Mother's Day wishes. At first I thought "how could I forget so quickly how much those words can hurt?", but then I realized maybe the simple fact that I DID instantly wonder, instantly second guess that statement, means I didn't forget at all.
Funny the insight that infertility, present or past, can give you about common everyday interactions.
3 comments:
Yeah, it's a crazy thought to think about, isn't it? And I think that once it's said, you totally shouldn't take it back - that could hurt worse. I'm sure you are okay though, since she opened it up. Had she been an infertile in a hurtful place, she'd not of said it to you, even knowing you were a mom.
It does affect you. When people admire my daughter in the supermarket, I find myself looking around and wondering if an infertile is standing nearby getting her feelings hurt.
I do't think you ever forget- thinking that instant 'oh no!' does mean that you remember & are sensitive to it still. I do agree with Nancy though- I think she wouldn't have brought it up had she not been in a place to talk about mother's day.
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